Long-distance relationships are something most people believe to bring failure. In the US alone, there are a whopping 14-15 million people in long distance relationships. When couples go off to college and separate, they are left facing a scary question: Should we breakup or stay together?
About 35% of long distance relationships are from college students and a surprising 75% of engaged couples have at one time in their relationship been long distance. Also, about 3% of marriages are long distance relationships in the United States.
I wanted to talk about this topic because frankly, I will be in a long distance relationship in less than a month. The thought of it terrifies me and I was always hoping I wouldn’t be a victim of it, but is that a positive way to look at it?
Not at all.
My boyfriend is going to China.
When my boyfriend first told me that he was leaving for China for about a year, my heart dropped. This is something that was floating around our relationship a lot and bringing us down plenty.
We faced many dark times in our relationship because of this matter. He is such a courageous, passionate man who is very determined to accomplish his dreams and goals. He has inspired me more than anyone in my entire life. We had first planned to go to Chicago together, but the plans changed. Certain personal things in our lives were getting in the way of this plan going smoothly, so now we have to be apart for a year. I like to say 10-11 months because that’s how long it truly is, and it sounds less painful haha.
I attached some links that go along with long distance relationships and talk all about them. If you are in a long distance or have or going to be in one, please feel free to talk to me. I would honestly love to talk to anyone who has experienced it before because I feel like quite a baby. I feel like I shouldn’t be so whiny about this because people who are married in the military are faced with much harder times.
“Despite what many people believe, LDRs do not break up at any greater rate than more traditional, geographically close, couples. Multiple studies comparing LDRs to geographically close couples find the same rates of breaking up over time.”
I found this statistic on one of the attached articles below. Reading this actually surprised me, but why I am so surprised? Because over the years any time someone was in a long distance relationship, all I heard were negative things from outsiders. Things like, “Oh they’ll never last”. Who are we to make that assumption?
I know for a fact that this is going to be a truly difficult task I will be facing over the course of the next year. Will this work out? I sure hope so. All I know now is having a negative attitude isn’t going to do me or my relationship any good whatsoever.
Now for the positives and what I am excited for when it comes to an LDR.
- I have all the time for myself. I have unlimited time to hangout and meet new friends. I get to grow and learn all I can about myself. I am in my years of molding into the woman I will be for the rest of my life.
- I get to focus on school, work, and FITNESS! This has given me extra motivation to workout and eat healthier. I can admit I’ve been slacking off lately and maybe it’s because I’m comfortable in my relationship. (My boyfriend and I LOVE eating and going to all kinds of restaurants.) Without him being with me, I won’t be going out to restaurants nearly as much and spending money…I get to save money as well!
- I am going to really work on getting the bikini body that I want. I want to become leaner overall and having so much time for myself will really let me focus on myself and my body.
I will be updating monthly on long distance relationships and the challenges I am faced with. I will also talk about all of the things I LOVE about long distance relationships.
If you are still reading, thank you for listening. Writing about this was extremely difficult but I feel like a huge weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
In the end of all of this, I feel like my father would be so happy for me and my boyfriend. My dad was always traveling the world and has seriously been EVERYWHERE. I know for a fact if he was here, my boyfriend and father would be talking about all of the amazing places they’ve been and seen… And that makes me feel really happy.
If I can surpass this pain from being away from my best friend and all of the tough times we may face, than I believe we will be able to get through absolutely anything, and that is a relationship I DEFINITELY want to be in. =)
Image via Flickr by horiavarlan